|Yours, Mine or His?|
|Season 1, episode 12|
|The Barnes family is staying in a cabin|
January 9, 2006
Yours, Mine or His? is the twelfth episode of Out of Practice.
Oliver sits down next to Regina at the diner, saying that the woman on the other side of the diner is the future Mrs. Oliver Barnes. Regina says she was the future Mrs. Regina Barnes until she threw a cell phone at Regina's head. Lesbians like to throw stuff. It's why they're so dominant at softball. Another woman approaches the first and Regina's dated that one as well. What could be worse than running into two exes. Her two exes then start to kiss. Oliver asks why cares because she has Beth now. Regina admits that she and Beth aren't together anymore. She got to the point where she realized they were only in the relationship because Beth was hot and so she slept with her a few more times and broke it off. Oliver says he loves that Regina's such a guy. Ben comes in. He's just there to grab a coffee before going to meet Stewart to drive up to the cabin. It sucks that Stewart and Lydia are splitting the week, because he'll get to sleep late and watch sports with Stewart while Oliver and Regina will be getting up early with Lydia for nature hikes and tours. Lydia comes in and informs Ben that she switched with Stewart. They leave to head up to the cabin.
Once they're gone, Regina spots Trisha at the counter and without pointing her out, asks Oliver about her, knowing that they'd dated. He gave her a birthday gift he'd bought for an old girlfriend, forgetting that he'd had it personalized. He then goes on to say the Trisha was so great. Trisha then interjects and says she has to get back to work, but invites Oliver to walk with her. She goes to grab her coat. Regina says he knew she was there and he admits that he saw her in the water glass.
At the cabin, Lydia and Ben are playing Scrabble. Ben says it's not snowing that hard. Maybe they could make it back to the city. Doesn't she want to be gone by the time Stewart and Crystal arrive? She says there's no way they'll make it up there. Ben leaves to go get more wood since they're going to stay there.
Just then, Stewart and Crystal enter the cabin. Stewart rented an SUV with snow chains. They still barely made it. He then admits to Crystal that he had very little control over the vehicle. She figured that out when he went through a fence and clipped a cow. They're stuck there now that they've arrived. Crystal's excited because it'll be like a party. Lydia says it'll be like the Donner party. Crystal says she's still feeling carsick. She had to keep the window open the whole way there. She hopes it wasn't too windy for those in the backseat. Oliver says his lips were getting a little cracked, but then the wind blew them right off his face. He then introduces Lydia to Trisha, whom he has brought along for the trip. She's a pastry chef. Oliver starts to flirt with her and Regina tells Lydia that she had to put up with three hours of that. Lydia thought she was bringing Beth, but Regina tells her they broke up. Regina's upset that she didn't even try to sound surprised. Stewart asks if he can help Lydia move her things out of the big bedroom. She doesn't want to give the room up, even when he threatens that he and Crystal will be in the room next door, with a very thin wall between them. Lydia brought earplugs and valium. She doesn't care. Stewart goes to take Crystal to the room, asking if she wants top or bottom. Crystal thinks he means sex, but he is actually talking about the bunk beds.
Oliver continues to flirt with Trisha and they go to unpack. Ben comes in and sees Regina and asks her about Beth. Regina says she should put on a t-shirt. She tells Ben she had to endure the ride up there with Oliver and Trisha. Ben is shocked that Oliver's back with Trisha, because he slept with her after she and Oliver broke up the first time. It was his wedding anniversary and she was upset about Oliver. Lydia says the theme of the party is now awkward sex triangles. Oliver comes back with Trisha and she and Ben awkwardly greet each other. Trisha wants some tea and Ben offers to show her where it is.
In the kitchen, Ben and Trisha discuss the situation. They made a mistake and she wants things to work out with Oliver this time. They agree to tell him once they're back in the city. Oliver then peeks his head into the kitchen and asks if they're up for a threesome in a game of Scrabble.
Stewart sees Lydia and Regina bundled up and asks them if they're going out in the horrible weather. They're going to the store for more wine. It's dangerous, but more dangerous would be trying to get through the night with only two bottles. Crystal and Trisha are going to go check out the lake. Once they're gone, Oliver says he can't believe he almost let Trisha get away. He asks Ben to promise that if he ever gets a hold of a girl like Trisha, he never lets go. Ben smiles awkwardly.
Stewart comes up and has Oliver try his sloppy joe mix, saying he added hot sauce. The added hot sauce makes Oliver's lips burn again and he rushes to find lip balm. He looks through the women's purses and finds some, which soothes his lips. While he was searching the purses, he also pulled out a pregnancy test, but he doesn't know which bag it was in. He's worried it's Trisha's and so is Ben. Stewart comes to investigate the noise and they tell him about the pregnancy test. When they say they don't know whose it is, Stewart also panics that it might be Crystal's. He advises them to put it back in any of the bags and forget they ever saw it.
The three men sit on the couch, staring at the pregnancy test. Stewart suggests they open it, because it might be empty or it could be used to carry something else. Oliver points out that Crystal was queasy earlier. Stewart thinks she was just carsick and tries to suggest that it's Trisha. Stewart says that one of them is in a lot of trouble, but Oliver points out that they broke up over a month ago and she could have been with someone else in that time. When he asks Ben about it, Ben says awkwardly that there's no point in worrying about it, but he's pretty sure it's Crystal's. Stewart says he's not cut out to be a father. He means again. His kids are just delights. When they hear the women coming back, they rush to hide the test and Ben ultimately throws it into the fire. They ask Crystal and Trisha about their walk. They saw a baby deer, which excited Crystal. Trisha asks if dinner's almost ready because she's been so hungry lately. She's also been craving French fries. Lydia and Regina then come in. Lydia threw a snowball at the baby deer. When Trisha asks if she smells burning plastic, Lydia suggests that Regina tell Stewart to get his girlfriend away from the open flame. They got the wine. Ben suggests that they offer their guests some wine. Crystal declines, but Trisha has some. Stewart, downtrodden, goes to check on dinner. When Ben sees that they're short on wine glasses, Regina says he and Oliver don't mind sharing.
Lydia goes to get more glasses and finds Stewart in the kitchen. He's imagining himself as a snowflake blowing in the wind. He confides in her about the pregnancy test. She laughs at the situation. She says it's not the end of the world. He was a good father to their kids. He'll be a good father again.
In the living room, Crystal is showing Trisha pictures of her family. Her mom and her aunt are twins. Twins run in her family, which freaks Stewart out even more. Crystal says she has an announcement to make. She builds it up a lot, but says she's getting a puppy. Stewart says he needs to go for a walk. Crystal wants to go with him, but says he's walking too fast and it's icy. Stewart falls.
Trisha has barely touched her wine, so Oliver asks her about it. She just wanted a taste. Ben and Oliver push her to drink more, confusing her. Lydia then invites Regina into the kitchen to talk, using the glass of wine to tempt Regina into following.
In the kitchen, Lydia says Trisha is pregnant. Regina asks how she knows and Lydia mentions the pregnancy test. Regina corrects that the test was actually hers. She brushes off Lydia's questions and goes to take a walk.
In the living room, Trisha talks to Ben and Oliver, who are both upset. Trisha says it's obvious why they're upset, but she thinks it's because Ben slept with her. Oliver says it could be Ben's baby then. Ben and Oliver fight over it, but Trisha says she's not pregnant. Ben and Oliver celebrate for a moment before Oliver registers that Ben slept with his girlfriend.
Regina comes back from her walk and Stewart and Lydia are in the kitchen. She tells them she's thinking about having a baby. She made an appointment next week to discuss in vitro fertilization. That's why she had the test. Lydia asks if she's sure she wants to have a baby by herself. She says ideally, no, but with her track record on relationships, it might be the only chance she has. Lydia says it's the most wonderful thing she could ever do. She doesn't want Regina giving up on love. Stewart says she has plenty of time to find the perfect woman. He says they can call him old-fashioned, but he thinks a child deserves a mother and a mother. Regina thanks them and says no matter what she decides, she knows one thing: they'll find out whether she wants them to or not. Ben comes in and says they tracked her to the warming hut and then sees that Regina is there and calls that he found her. Oliver comes in and pretends to be okay with Ben sleeping with Trisha. Ben asks if he's really okay and he says maybe or maybe not and tells Ben to sleep tight. Lydia grabs a tray of sloppy joes and says they should eat dinner, go to bed, and get up well-rested for sunrise snow yoga. Stewart holds Regina back and asks her if she wants to get a head start on the parenting thing, but she tells him she won't take the puppy.
Ben and Oliver are playing Scrabble. Oliver plays drizbag on a triple word score for 134 points. Ben challenges the word and Oliver says, "I want to punch the drizbag that slept with my girlfriend." Ben counts the points.
- Christopher Gorham as Ben Barnes
- Paula Marshall as Regina Barnes
- Ty Burrell as Oliver Barnes
- Jennifer Tilly as Crystal
- Henry Winkler as Stewart Barnes
- Stockard Channing as Lydia Barnes
Notes and TriviaEdit
- This episode was produced as the fifteenth episode, but aired as the twelfth.
A complete overview of this episode's crew can be found here.
|Out of Practice Episodes|
|#02||"We Wanna Hold Your Hand"||#10||"Guilt Trip"||#18||"Losing Patients"|
|#03||"And I'll Cry If I Want To"||#11||"New Year's Eve"||#19||"Doctors Without Bidders"|
|#04||"The Truth About Nerds & Dogs"||#12||"Yours, Mine or His?"||#20||"If These Floors Could Talk"|
|#05||"Brothers Grim"||#13||"Model Behavior"||#21||"The Lady Doth Protest Too Much"|
|#06||"The Heartbreak Kid"||#14||"Hot Water"||#22||"Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. And Do. And..."|
|#07||"Key Ingredients"||#15||"You Win Some, You Use Some"|
|#08||"The Wedding"||#16||"Doctor of the Year"|
|Out of Practice Episodes|