|We Wanna Hold Your Hand|
|Season 1, episode 2|
|Ben is upset that his mother made a schedule for spending time with him|
September 26, 2005
We Wanna Hold Your Hand is the second episode of Out of Practice.
Stewart enters the diner, where Oliver and Regina are eating and greets them. Stewart says he's concerned about something behind Regina's ear and he reaches out and produces a flower. He's dusting off his old magic tricks because he finds that it relaxes patients. Oliver says he can picture that, saying a delightful trick will distract them from getting a camera put down their esophaguses. Lydia comes in and says good morning. She thanks them for coming. Say knows it's early and comments that some of them look like they got dressed in the dark, noting Regina's outfit. She's worried about Ben and says the first weekend after the marriage ends is hardest. During hers, she was relieved, but lonely. She wants to make sure Ben has company. Stewart deduces that she wants to make a schedule. Oliver wonders how he knows that and he says he was married to her for 33 years. Oliver points out that he's 35, so Stewart corrects that he meant 35. They need to make it quick so it's done before Ben gets there. A beautiful woman walks in, distracting Regina, Oliver, and Stewart while Lydia tries to make the schedule. Lydia wants them back on task, but Oliver points out that the woman is Gail Henson aka the Holy Gail. He gets up to introduce himself. He thanks her, saying he's a cosmetic surgeon and he's given her perfect nose to many satisfied customers. She's not sure if she should be flattered or ask for a cut. He says that could be arranged.
Back at the table, Regina says Lydia didn't rally the troops when she broke up with Lisa. Lydia apologizes for failing her, saying perhaps she was still getting over her breakups from Ruth, Chloe, Sara, Stephanie, Brenda, Joy, Maxine, Lisa #1, and Tanya. Regina's impressed that she remembers them all and Lydia asks if Regina does. Oliver comes back to the table and says Gail is working all day and going back to LA tomorrow. She'll call if she has time after her shoot, but it doesn't look good. Regina watches her leave and says it looks good from there. Lydia doles out their assignments for Ben. She wants Stewart to write his down, but he refuses, saying he won't forget. She points out that he forgot that Oliver is 35. Regina says she's going overboard. Ben's not an emotional wreck.
Ben comes in and says he's hanging in there. He then sees the waitress, Amy, and notes that he hasn't seen her in a while. She was at her sister's wedding in Maine. She shows them a picture of the couple leaving the church. Ben says they look so happy and starts to cry. Lydia goes to grab Stewart's hanky for him, but finds that it's another magic trick.
Lydia and Ben come in to Ben's apartment after shopping. Ben says he didn't need new clothes, but Lydia says that when you start sleeping alone again, you have to keep up your self-esteem by wearing nice things to bed. After she and Stewart separated, she nearly cleaned out Victoria's Secret. Ben knows because he was there. Lydia asks why he still has so many pictures of Naomi because he's just torturing himself with them. He was trying to figure out what went wrong. Was he so busy trying to fix other people's marriages that he neglected his own? Lydia reminds him that this week was his birthday and Naomi was changed to a tree instead of being there. She says his father has an eye for the ladies, but never threw him over for a Redwood. Oliver comes in asking who's hungry. Ben says he's up for lunch and Oliver produces a takeout bag for him. Lydia questions why there's only enough for one and Oliver says he can't stay. She sends Ben to the kitchen, lying about the bag leaking, and asks Oliver why he's bailing on Ben. Oliver says he got paged for a patient with an infection, but he still found time to get Ben some lunch. Just then Gail peeks in and says she has to get back to her shoot by 2:15. Lydia introduces herself and tells her that Oliver's brother, Ben, will be joining them for lunch because his wife just left him. Ben comes out of the kitchen and Oliver tries to hint to Ben to decline the lunch invitation. Gail says she'll just get back to her shoot and call Oliver later if she has time. Lydia says she'll go with and they can share a cab because it's hard to get one this time of day. Gail says that's never a problem for her, which Lydia says is lovely. After they've left, Ben puts together that that was the Holy Gail.
At the diner, Regina comes in and Oliver is relieved that he can leave. Ben's in the bathroom. Regina breaks the news that she can't stay. They need her in the ER. Oliver says he can't do a double because Ben refuses to be cheered up. Regina reminds him that Naomi left Ben three days ago, to which Oliver says he should get over it. He talked about her through their entire game of basketball. He made two Puerto Rican guys cry. Regina says she already called for backup. Lydia comes in and asks why they can't stick to the schedule. Every time she tries to get Regina to do something, some emergency comes up. Regina asks why she thinks that is. Could it be because she works in the emergency room? Maybe she should transfer to the no-big-deal whenever room. She leaves. Lydia wants just one member of the family to do what they're supposed to do when they're supposed to do it. Stewart then comes in and proudly declares that he's on time. He asks where Ben is. Lydia says it's not his shift. She knew he'd forget, so she wrote it down on a napkin and he forgot the napkin. Stewart tries to do a magic trick on her, but she stops him.
Ben comes out of the bathroom and is surprised to see all of them there. He asks what's going on. They start making excuses and Lydia says they could have a drink with her divorce lawyer. Ben says it's too soon to have a lawyer, but Lydia says he has to fight for what's his. Ben says it's not the right time to be doing that with her, because according to the napkin on the table, Regina was supposed to be babysitting him right then. Stewart takes his hanky, covers the napkin, and tries to make it disappear. Ben is upset that they made a schedule. She thought he'd need someone to talk to. He says he does, but they don't want to talk. They just want to distract him. He says Oliver could learn a lot about emotional availability from Jorge and Julio. Ben says they don't know what's best for him. Stewart says he can come over that night and talk as much as he wants. He'll invite Regina and asks Oliver if he's in, which he is. Stewart leaves, saying he'll see them at eight. Oliver's phone rings. It's Gail. Oliver tells Ben he loves him very much and Ben tells him just to go. Ben says he's going for a walk and Lydia gives him her umbrella. He's upset because again, she thinks she knows what's best, but just then, it starts to rain and he takes the umbrella and thanks her.
At Stewart's, the doorbell rings and he answers it, expecting Ben, but finds Lydia instead. He tries to close the door, but she stops him, saying she's there to check on Ben. Ben's not there yet. Lydia checks out the place. She says it stinks and Stewart says he's cooking. The doorbell rings again and it's Regina. Regina has mint chocolate chip ice cream, Ben's comfort food. Stewart points out that it's hers too. From the kitchen, Lydia says the it's a pigsty and says he's as messy as Regina just as she sees that Regina is there. The doorbell rings again and Stewart says Ben is there to do whatever it takes to get him through his pain. Ben is wet and hugs Stewart enthusiastically. He gave Lydia's umbrella to a homeless woman. He's in a good mood because he's decided he's going to fight for his marriage. He's going to fly to Oregon tomorrow. Stewart says he's behind him 100% and Lydia ushers him into the kitchen.
In the kitchen, Lydia says Stewart knows he's better off without Naomi, so what is he doing? What if she breaks his heart again, or worse, comes back? Stewart says it's better that Ben thinks they're on his side. Lydia says Stewart will be the supportive one while she's the truth-telling hard-ass, like it's always been. Lydia says she won't be the one to burst his bubble. She pulls out her phone and calls Oliver to come talk to Ben. She explains the situation to Oliver over the phone as Oliver is trying to woo Gail. Lydia pressures him, saying that it'll mean Naomi for Christmas if he doesn't do this and he agrees to come right over.
Ben leaves a message for Naomi saying they need to talk. He makes a bad tree pun in the message and Regina says she'd leave him for that pun. Stewart says it would be a romantic gesture. Ben says Naomi doesn't think they like her, but he says that nonsense and they love her. Just then, Crystal comes in, apologizing for being late. She's shocked to see the rest of them there. She has her nights mixed up because of Stewart, who admits that he should keep a schedule. He tries to take her coat, but she says that's not a good idea, reminding him of the secretary's day gift he gave her. Lydia offers her wine or a pole. Ben asks for a phone book so he can book his flight and is directed to the kitchen. Crystal assures Lydia that in the year between her starting to work for Stewart and the divorce, he didn't lay a hand on her. Lydia says that makes two of them. Crystal goes to change and says she may need help with the buckles. Regina jumps up to help, but Lydia stops her.
Oliver comes in with Gail, saying it'll only take a minute. Gail needs a powder room and Regina offers to show her, but Lydia again directs her to sit down and sends Gail tot he powder room and Oliver to the kitchen. Stewart stops him, saying they should just wish him good luck, but Oliver says he's already had good luck by her leaving him. Stewart isn't sure he'll be happier without Naomi and thinks they're just glad to be rid of her. Regina is on his side, saying Naomi was always nice to her. Oliver says she's a lesbian and Naomi couldn't like her more if she were a spotted owl. Ben comes out of the kitchen and says he found a flight that leaves tonight. He's wiling to do whatever it takes. His phone rings and he answers it. It's Naomi. He tells her he's leaving, but she's actually in New York, but she doesn't want to meet up with him. She's been back for a week. He says it's a good sign because she could have just ignored his messages, but she didn't just let him fly out there. Stewart then goes off, saying she's insane and she's not a nice lady and Ben should lose her. They all start piling on. Ben is shocked, saying they've been pretending to like her all night, but Stewart says they've been pretending to like her for seven years and he's personally exhausted. Oliver says when he gets dumped, he finds a prettier girl, liquors her up, and nails her. Gail comes out in time to hear that and Oliver tells her he's almost done. She says no almost and leaves. Ben says he's going home. They try to stop him and follow him downstairs. Lydia offers her lawyer's card. He says his marriage is not over and goes into his apartment to find all the furniture missing.
In the hallway, they knock on the door. He peeks out. They say they've always been too hard on Naomi, but he tells them not to beat themselves up. He's not mad, just tired. Oliver then sees through the crack that his stuff is gone. They all go in to the nearly empty apartment. She knew he was out because of the messages he'd left her all day. His family says they love him. Stewart says they should go upstairs and have dinner. Ben says they make him crazy sometimes. Regina points out that Naomi did that, too, but there was a difference. Lydia say they'll never leave him, but Ben was talking about the sex. Stewart says they should go upstairs and all be together. He leaves. Lydia says there will be her ex-husband, his girlfriend, and a pungent curry. Does he see what she puts up with? She leaves and Regina follows her, echoing her sentiment. Oliver says it's good that they'll be there for each other tonight, as they both lost women who meant a great deal to them. Oliver leaves and Ben takes a look around before closing the door.
Ben sits in his kitchen, eating cereal that's sitting on some cardboard boxes. Stewart comes in and brings Ben's paper, saying his place needs cheering up. He pulls a bouquet of fake flowers out of his sleeve. Ben says he doesn't know if Naomi left him a vase. Stewart tries to pull that out, too, but accidentally throws it and it breaks. He asks if Stewart has a broom. Stewart pretends to check and then gives Ben a kiss before leaving.
- Christopher Gorham as Ben Barnes
- Paula Marshall as Regina Barnes
- Ty Burrell as Oliver Barnes
- Henry Winkler as Stewart Barnes
- Stockard Channing as Lydia Barnes
Notes and TriviaEdit
- This was produced as the third episode, but aired as the second.
A complete overview of this episode's crew can be found here.
|Out of Practice Episodes|
|#02||"We Wanna Hold Your Hand"||#10||"Guilt Trip"||#18||"Losing Patients"|
|#03||"And I'll Cry If I Want To"||#11||"New Year's Eve"||#19||"Doctors Without Bidders"|
|#04||"The Truth About Nerds & Dogs"||#12||"Yours, Mine or His?"||#20||"If These Floors Could Talk"|
|#05||"Brothers Grim"||#13||"Model Behavior"||#21||"The Lady Doth Protest Too Much"|
|#06||"The Heartbreak Kid"||#14||"Hot Water"||#22||"Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. And Do. And..."|
|#07||"Key Ingredients"||#15||"You Win Some, You Use Some"|
|#08||"The Wedding"||#16||"Doctor of the Year"|
|Out of Practice Episodes|