|The Heartbreak Kid|
|Season 1, episode 6|
|Oliver bids against a wealthy man|
October 24, 2005
The Heartbreak Kid is the sixth episode of Out of Practice.
Stewart comes into Ben and Oliver's apartment with two ties and asks them to choose one for him to wear to dinner with Crystal. Oliver says to wear the gold one and give her the green one as a blindfold. Ben is surprised that Stewart's not going to the hospital fundraiser, but he says he's taking Crystal to Tavern on the Green because there was a mishap in the bedroom. He called her Lydia when he said goodnight. She was upset, so they talked about it and he went back to sleep, not realizing she wasn't done talking about it. She pushed him out of bed. But he thinks a fancy dinner and some tears will fix it. Oliver tells his father that he has a date for the evening, Sophie, a pharmaceutical sales rep. Stewart says every doctor in the hospital has tried to hit on her. Oliver says they failed, so he's going another route. He's just enjoying her company, treating her like a friend. Stewart is confused, but Ben says it's part of Oliver's plan. Oliver's sure it'll work. Stewart says he needs to go get tulips for Crystal, her favorite. Oliver points out that those are Lydia's favorite and Stewart remembers that Crystal's favorites are sunflowers. Ben says seeing them jump through hoops makes him glad he's flying solo. Just then Lydia comes in dressed for the party and looking for Ben.
Lydia tells Ben how happy she is to be there with him instead of his father, who would attack any waiter with shrimp. She looks over to see Ben eating shrimp. Lydia hears her name and sees Elliot Hellerman, who flirts with her. He's a urologist. After he leaves, Lydia says he cleans up well. Oliver comes up with Sophie and makes fun of Ben for holding their mom's purse. Sophie thanks Oliver for inviting her. He tries to play it cool.
Sophie goes over and looks at the items they're auctioning and sees an apple picking trip. Oliver bids on the trip. Sophie leaves to get them a drink as Billy comes up with his grandpa. They had previously bid on the apple trip and at Billy's prompting, his grandfather bids again. Oliver discovers that the man he's bidding against is the wealthy man who donated a large amount of money to the hospital. They start a bidding war, which Oliver wins after placing a very large bid. Mr. Chadwell leads Billy away, saying he'll buy him a pony. Ben comes up and makes fun of Oliver's plan and Oliver says at least he's not on a date with his mother. Ben denies that he is. Oliver says they're like an old married couple. Ben denies it, but then Lydia comes up and asks Ben to check her zipper. Elliot comes up and tells Lydia she beat him out for the season tickets. Lydia excitedly tells Ben she got them season tickets to The Best of Broadway. Elliot says Ben's the real winner. The music starts and Lydia pulls Ben out to dance with her.
Ben comes into the diner and sees Regina there. He's there to meet Lydia. She makes fun of him for his "date" with Lydia. Ben sits down and talks to Regina about the situation with their mom and Regina says he needs to break up with her. She gives him some tips and leaves when she sees Lydia coming in. Lydia says they've been invited to a weekly Saturday game night. He starts the breakup speech and Lydia eventually catches on to what he's doing. He says he doesn't want her to use him as a crutch. She tells him she's actually having dinner with Elliot and leaves.
Ben tells Oliver that she left their mom two messages and she hasn't called back. Oliver see Sophie coming in the diner and calls to her, but she's on the phone. Oliver starts to say that he doesn't even care anymore if they have sex, but he can't get it all the way out. Sophie comes up and tells Ben that his brother is great. He's been a great friend. Her phone rings and she says it's the inn. She wants confirmation that they got a second room because they were going to put them in a single room. Oliver is upset that his plan has been derailed. He needs to unload the apple trip. Lydia comes in and greets Oliver happily and Ben curtly. Ben goes to Lydia and asks how her date was. She says it went well, but he might have been faking it.
Stewart comes in and asks Ben and Oliver if they've seen Crystal. He was supposed to meet her there to celebrate. He doesn't know what they're celebrating, but he's not taking any chances. They've been dating for about sixth months, but who celebrates that. Oliver points out that that would be the same woman who hired a harpist for their monthiversary. He sees Crystal outside and says she has a gift and he doesn't have one. Oliver suddenly has the idea to give him the apple trip.
Ben goes to leave the diner and runs into Elliot, who says he hopes Lydia's feeling better because she cancelled their date because she wasn't feeling well. Ben says she's feeling better now and he should go say hi. While he goes to put his coat up, Ben goes to apologize to Lydia. He asks for more details about her date and she struggles to make something up. As she's describing a fake dinner, Elliot comes up and says it sounds great. She says it was and is shocked to see him. He says to call her if she's free sometime and leaves. Lydia now knows that Ben knows she lied. She says she didn't want to go on a date. Ben says it's normal to be nervous. Lydia says she'll call once she gets home, but Ben points out that he's in the same diner. Lydia protests that he's on the phone, with someone, and eating just as all three of those things end. She begrudgingly gets up and walks to him.
Regina and Oliver enter the apartment and Regina asks why he won't just break it off. He won't because he still feels like he has a chance. He checks the answering machine and there's a message from Sophie asking him to call. She likes a guy, but thinks he might have a girlfriend. Ben rushes in and says he needs dirty laundry. He dumps a basket out just as Oliver says it's clean. Ben says the pretty neighbor girl is heading down, so this is his shot. He ruffles up the laundry and Oliver interrupts, saying he has a few tips on how to get women. Regina leans over to replay Sophie's message and Oliver turns it off and wishes Ben good luck. Ben tells them Lydia faked her date. He says he gave her tough love and they wonder if that was a good idea, given that she was scared. Ben defends his actions and leaves with the laundry. He comes back a moment later and Oliver tells him to say hi to their mom for them. Ben says maybe he will and maybe he won't.
Lydia messes with her scarf as she gets ready for her date. The doorbell rings and she nervously answers it. It's Ben and he's there to make sure she's okay. He gives her a pep talk and asks what could go wrong. She gives a list of possibilities and he says she could also have a wonderful time. He says to talk about her work as a cardiologist, but Elliot's wife died of a heart attack. He says it's not too late to cancel just as the doorbell rings. She walks to the door, saying she'll consider herself lucky if she remembers his name. She turns to him and he reminds her that it's Elliot. She opens the door, but it's Regina and Oliver there to wish her luck. Regina asks her about the scarf and she decides to ditch it. She begs them not to tell their father. Oliver says he has just one piece of advice: If she wants to be just friends, break it off early. He doesn't want to be just friends. Guys don't really need anymore friends. He remembers that he forgot to cancel the skywriter he hired for the apple orchard. She says they're great kids. The doorbell rings and she sends them away. They go out the back door and Ben invites her to coffee the next day. It's not Elliot at the door, but Stewart with Monty. She wants him to take Monty for the weekend so he could go away. He offers to feed Monty for her and she says she's going out. She makes up a fake reason and he says she'll be great. The doorbell rings and he excuses himself to the kitchen to feed Monty as Lydia leaves with Elliot.
Stewart is on the phone with Crystal, saying he had a great weekend with her. There are apples on his table. He says goodnight and accidentally calls her Lydia again before hanging up. The phone rings and he slowly backs away from it.
- Christopher Gorham as Ben Barnes
- Paula Marshall as Regina Barnes
- Ty Burrell as Oliver Barnes
- Henry Winkler as Stewart Barnes
- Stockard Channing as Lydia Barnes
Notes and TriviaEdit
- This episode was produced as the eighth episode, but aired as the sixth.
A complete overview of this episode's crew can be found here.
|Out of Practice Episodes|
|#02||"We Wanna Hold Your Hand"||#10||"Guilt Trip"||#18||"Losing Patients"|
|#03||"And I'll Cry If I Want To"||#11||"New Year's Eve"||#19||"Doctors Without Bidders"|
|#04||"The Truth About Nerds & Dogs"||#12||"Yours, Mine or His?"||#20||"If These Floors Could Talk"|
|#05||"Brothers Grim"||#13||"Model Behavior"||#21||"The Lady Doth Protest Too Much"|
|#06||"The Heartbreak Kid"||#14||"Hot Water"||#22||"Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. And Do. And..."|
|#07||"Key Ingredients"||#15||"You Win Some, You Use Some"|
|#08||"The Wedding"||#16||"Doctor of the Year"|
|Out of Practice Episodes|